Organ donation week 2017

This week is National Organ Donation week, and I have been crazy busy working! 

That opening sentence alone speaks volumes about my life now as opposed to my life pre-transplant. This week I have 3 cake order (I had 2last week too), I went to volunteer with the organ donation team at my local hospital in my new role as ambassador helping with a sign up stand, I did two interviews with local press and sent quite a lot of emails to make it all work. It's only Wednesday! 

This time 6 years ago, my life was completely different. I was on oxygen constantly, used a non-invasive ventilator, which may be non invasive but was a very unpleasant thing to use. I relied on everyone else to help me, from being pushed in a wheelchair, to administering constant doses of drugs, to helping me wash, dress, walk, talk. I was in constant pain and always breathless, I looked like a bag of bones even though I was fed by a tube down my nose into my stomach every night. That was just physically. Mentally I was a 20 year old having to face the fact I was going to die. Die without having accomplished anything I wanted. Without meeting my niece, without seeing my nephews grow up, without being able to chase my dreams, or hug my mum, or celebrate a birthday. 

The fact that someone decided to go on the donor register and by a miracle of fate I was saved by that decision, isn't something I can fully comprehend. It's awe-inspiring, overwhelming, humbling, and a million other things. I can't cope with the fact that I got my call and so many friends didn't get there's, and we're lost into the 'what if' void. I grieve for them, and the lives unlived. I grieve for my donor and their life cut short. For their incredible family left behind. I wonder why I am still here. I strive to do my best to live for us all but that's a lot of pressure on anyone's shoulders. 

Times are often very tough, lots of issues still remain. But I am alive. I can hug my mum, take my nephews out for dinner, scream when they hide and jump out on me. I can move forward, I'm not where I want to be but I'm in a pretty good place and I am unbelievably lucky to be here. Not everyone is. 

Please please consider signing the register if you haven't. Please share this blog or any of my posts/tweets/news articles if you think it can convince someone. One person can utterly transform lives. I cannot tell you how desperate that long wait truly is. Give someone a chance, because I promise you, that's all they want. 


Infusions and endoscopes and colonoscopies... oh my!

I think Dorothy got the better end of the deal with lions and tigers and bears but hey, you can't win them all! 

So as promised I made you a vlog! I have no idea if anyone will make it to the end (or even watch at all) but please give it a go if for nothing else it's taken hours of my life!!! 

Tests are over for the time being, but spoiler alert nothing was as bad as I thought it would be. The worst part was the hunger. So much in fact that it got me thinking about this was a 4 day thing for me but for a lot of people, not being able to afford to eat regularly all the time. Puts it in perspective. So once I was able to eat on Monday I came home and donated to The Trussell Trust, a food bank charity that supports those who need it. 

So please watch and let me know what you think. I promise there's nothing graphic in there! 



Daily Gratitude

Just a very quick blog to let you know I'm still alive and haven't gone completely crazy yet! That said from Friday until Monday I'm on a liquid only diet and a shit tonne of laxatives (excuse the pun!) so sanity might take a dip then! 

Anyway to help me lately I've been trying to do daily gratitude. Basically as it says on the box. I think everyone actually does this subconsciously or not but to actually give thought to it for a few minutes each day is really nice. You're thinking on your blessings and realising the good things in life, can't be bad can it?! 
So I thought I'd share my list today, it's by no means extensive but I try to limit to 5ish things. 

1) I'm grateful for my parents who are incredible and constantly help and support me. 

2) I'm grateful for Lucky dog who always gives me love and hugs when I need them and makes me smile even if I'm crying.

3) I'm grateful I can breathe easily.

4) I'm grateful for the sunshine warming my skin.

5) I'm grateful for the breakfast I just ate so I'm not hungry and because it tasted delicious. 

6) I'm grateful to be able to see and hear and touch and taste.

7) I'm grateful for this lovely cup of tea I'm drinking.

So there you go! Not groundbreaking things but it's nice to acknowledge them and be thankful. 
What are you thankful for today?